Listen guys, there’s some very important Cheryl Fernandez-Versini news that we desperately need to share with you – She definitely, DEFINITELY does not fart in front of her husband.
We know, right, MIND-BLOWING NEWS.
The X Factor judge opened up on Jonathan Ross’ chat show this week – treating us all to the inside scoop on what married life with Jean-Bernard is REALLY like.
And you know what, apparently it’s amazing! HOORAY FOR LOVE.
When asked by Jonathan how married life is treating her, Chezza simply said, “it’s great” before adding that she remembers her anniversary because the date is “7, 7, 14”.
You know what, it’s refreshing to see how highly prized numeracy skills were for the ladies of Girls Aloud.
Anyway, it’s all very much FAB in Cheryl’s life at the moment, admitting that she was still in the ‘honeymoon phase’ (whatever that is, we’ve certainly never bleedin’ found it).
It’s also smelling quite fresh in the Fernandez-Versini household too, as farting is apparently non-existent. Wossy asked “So you’re not farting in front of each other yet?”
“I don’t do that anyway.”
What, never? Either Cheryl’s a medical marvel or she’s in dire need of some roughage in her diet.
The popstar also hinted how Jean-Bernard has been teaching her some naughty French words (and no, we don’t mean how to say ‘Louis Walsh is an a**hole’ in French).
When asked about how many French words she knew, Chezza said:“I couldn’t possibly say them on ITV” and when Jonathan asked if that was because they were too “saucy”, Cheryl grinned, “I couldn’t possibly reveal.”
“I hear when he’s on the phone and stuff, that’s when I pick it up. I can understand more than I can speak to be honest, otherwise it’d be very offensive stuff that I’d be saying.”
Well who needs to speak another language when you’ve already mastered the LANGUAGE OF LOVE, EH?!
Now go off and have a cold shower, you massive pair of lovebirds.
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