Made In Chelsea returned to our screens last night and GOOD LORD wasn’t it a hoot?
SW3’s finest have put down the croquet bats for 10 mins and have swanned off to the Big Apple to inflict their dramas on an ill-prepared American public and it was drama-drama-drama from the get-go.
(Maybe this is our revenge for the Kardashians?)
But what exactly went down?
Well, after a quick re-cap – which basically consisted of footage from the never-ending saga that was Binky and Alex’s love life ON LOOP – the producers showed us what the gang was up to in their downtime.
Looking a little bit like a dodgy remake of Sex And The City, we saw the gals strolling up and down the streets looking bored and vacuous carefree and giddy as they burned a hole in their purses.
And the boys? Well it became quite apparent very early on that the lads were not really planning on changing the stereotype of ‘posh Brits abroad’, and predictably spent most of the episode ogling American ‘totty’ (ew) and pouring champagne down each other.
SEE, THEY’RE *JUST* LIKE US, GUYS!
A HUGE talking point in this episode was the gang’s new-found fondness for brunch, which they LITERALLY wouldn’t stop talking about – treating the discovery of having your lunch a little bit early as profound and mind-blowing as if it were the discovery of penicillin.
We saw our favourite poshos living it up at one of these rooftop ‘brunches’, an d it soon became apparent that all is not well in the female camp, as ALL the girls have basically decided that Lucy Watson’s been really annoying and rude of late, with Rosie Fortescue (actually speaking for longer than 4 seconds) leading the #sendlucyhome campaign.
Lucy continued to remain as unphased and fabulous as ever, letting her thoughts on the matter be known by branding them all “Cold B****es”.
Short and sweet babes, just how we like it.
New to the series this year is Scott Disick impersonator Alik (who’s already snapped Louise AND Rosie up for dates) and apparent ‘fashion blogger’ Billie, who Lucy ‘The Pariah’ Watson was quick to make BEST pals with (mainly because no-one else really liked her at this point).
Obviously, Lucy needs a partner in crime and this Billie girl probably wants to get her end away with a blue-blooded Brit boy (which Lucy can probably help out with) so naturally the producers have brought this duo together.
Spencer and Jamie (the latter of whom was dressed up in some sort of luminous orange EasyJet uniform at the ‘brunch’) are both predictably lusting after this new Billie bird, which will inevitably lead onto the whole ‘YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE MY BRO, WHY ARE YOU HITTING ON MY GIRL’ cyclical argument that happens every series. Poor Stevie (weirdly still trying to be a ‘bad boy’ after his dalliance with Stephanie Pratt in the last series) got politely rebuffed by Billie at a party at the boy’s house later on.
After trying and failing to charm Billie’s pants off (with Lucy acting as disinterested interested wingman) Stevie tried the age-old ‘Do you want to see what my bedroom looks like?’ trick – which, needless to say, didn’t work. Greasy Lothario extraordinaire Spencer – who was bizarrely VERY keen on getting some lube(?) for the party - had already swooped in and asked her out
for one of his notorious drinks – the scamp.
Meanwhile, Binky has also arrived in New York (where she’s staying with her sister) but is sans Alex Mytton and his “Lego-haircut” (Thanks, Cheska) and is all about being a strong, single independent woman – which is slightly ruined by the fact that she never shuts up about her ex. Like, ever. She’s angry at Jamie for still being ‘pals’ with him, (poor Jamie probably just wants in on one of Alex’s notorious orgies) but is going to get even angrier next week that old Lego-Hair has actually FOLLOWED her to NYC…
We were also treated to the ‘next time’ bit at the end – where we saw Jamie and Alex having a right old barney, with Jamie proving that he has a VERY unfortunate crying face.
BUT WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?!
Guess we’ll just have to wait until next week to find out. BOOOO.
[ Made In Chelsea Cast Land Back In UK After ‘Best Two Months Of Their Lives’ In NYC. Bring On #MICNY ]
[ Made In Chelsea’s Binky Felstead And Mark-Francis Vandelli Indulge In NYC Retail Therapy ]